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A place on the internet to discuss MSU sports, raw milk, and English mustard, tell made up stories and generally act like an idiot when no one is watching. Sarcasm encouraged.


Help! Sliced my gums while eating...

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Help! Sliced my gums while eating... Empty Help! Sliced my gums while eating...

Post by tGreenWay 2014-06-17, 18:24

white cheddar popcorn. Damn free roaming kernel skins! It hurts so much. How can I ease my pain?
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Post by Minnie 2014-06-17, 18:25

Rinse your mouth with warm salt water.
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Post by tTito 2014-06-17, 18:26

Eat a pussy. Oh, wait, it's you.
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Post by tGreenWay 2014-06-17, 18:26

Minnie wrote:Rinse your mouth with warm salt water.

Sounds complicated. Is it gonna hurt?
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Post by tGreenWay 2014-06-17, 18:27

tTito wrote:Eat a pussy. Oh, wait, it's you.

I'm allergic to cats.
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Post by Minnie 2014-06-17, 18:30

tGreenWay wrote:

Sounds complicated. Is it gonna hurt?
Won't hurt, actually very soothing.
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Post by Gomer 2014-06-17, 18:30

tGreenWay wrote:white cheddar popcorn.  Damn free roaming kernel skins!  It hurts so much.  How can I ease my pain?
Help! Sliced my gums while eating... 066617__00464
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Post by tGreenWay 2014-06-17, 18:37

Minnie wrote:Won't hurt, actually very soothing.

You're such a good person. We don't deserve you, Minnie, but I'm glad you're here.
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Post by Turtleneck 2014-06-17, 18:38

Minnie wrote:
Won't hurt, actually very soothing.
  
This seems like a Brodson line.
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Post by tGreenWay 2014-06-17, 18:41

Gomer wrote:
Help! Sliced my gums while eating... 066617__00464


Maybe it's the beer talking, but that photo gave me an idea: Why aren't those kinds of products flavored? So what if she has a little cheese on the taco? Why not make White cheddar-flavored Vagisil™? Or honey-roasted, or jalapeño?
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Post by tGreenWay 2014-06-17, 18:44

Turtleneck wrote:
  
This seems like a Brodson line.

Anal is highly therapeutic.
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Post by Chitown_Badger 2014-06-17, 18:46

Gomer wrote:
Help! Sliced my gums while eating... 066617__00464

http://www.southparkstudios.com/clips/359100/bring-it-on
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Post by NigelUno 2014-06-17, 18:47

Amputate.
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Post by Cym Jim 2014-06-17, 18:52

Minnie wrote:Rinse your mouth with warm salt water.
Semen?
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Post by tGreenWay 2014-06-17, 18:53

NigelUno wrote:Amputate.

Just the gum that's sliced up, or cut out my entire mouth?
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Post by tGreenWay 2014-06-17, 18:56

Cym Jim wrote:
Semen?

We're not talking about dental hygiene here. I know you Brits aren't up on care for teeth.
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Post by Turtleneck 2014-06-17, 18:57

tGreenWay wrote:

Just the gum that's sliced up, or cut out my entire mouth?

Cut off your head before it spreads below the neck.
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Post by tGreenWay 2014-06-17, 19:03

Turtleneck wrote:

Cut off your head before it spreads below the neck.

I'm not falling for that again. Skullfuck me once, shame on you...
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Post by Turtleneck 2014-06-17, 19:06

It was funny the first time. You were running around without a head, while your head was on the ground screaming about Roushar.
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Post by tGreenWay 2014-06-17, 19:11

Turtleneck wrote:It was funny the first time. You were running around without a head, while your head was on the ground screaming about Roushar.

That's part of the reason I'm not falling for it again. If my head is there, laying on the ground, and I start screaming about Roushar again, I'm going to look pretty stupid.
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Post by Rocinante 2014-06-17, 20:34

I like this thread.
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Post by tGreenWay 2014-06-17, 21:08

Rocinante wrote:I like this thread.

Just trying to bring some variety to the masses.
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Post by Floyd Robertson 2014-06-17, 21:30

tGreenWay wrote:Just trying to bring some variety to the mastication

FIFY
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Post by Stugots 2014-06-17, 21:52

tGreenWay wrote:white cheddar popcorn.  Damn free roaming kernel skins!  It hurts so much.  How can I ease my pain?

Dude, Orajel (or equivalent products w/ benzocaine). That shit will numb it up for you. But cuts inside the mouth tend to heal very quickly anyways.
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Post by Stugots 2014-06-17, 22:01

tGreenWay wrote:


Maybe it's the beer talking, but that photo gave me an idea:  Why aren't those kinds of products flavored?  So what if she has a little cheese on the taco?  Why not make White cheddar-flavored Vagisil™?  Or honey-roasted, or jalapeño?

After reading that, I threw up in my mouth a little bit.
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Post by tGreenWay 2014-06-17, 22:20

Floyd Robertson wrote:

FIFY

I'm going to chew on your response for awhile.
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Post by tGreenWay 2014-06-17, 22:21

Stugots wrote:

Dude, Orajel (or equivalent products w/ benzocaine). That shit will numb it up for you. But cuts inside the mouth tend to heal very quickly anyways.

Thanks! Picked some up at Walgreen's.
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Post by tGreenWay 2014-06-17, 22:23

Stugots wrote:

After reading that, I threw up in my mouth a little bit.

Better now than after ingesting some butterscotch-flavored Vagisil. She'd really be offended.
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Post by LoneWolfSparty 2014-06-18, 06:51

Try flossing regularly, it toughens up your gums so you can handle things other than baby food without injury. Wussy.
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Post by MSU addict 2014-06-18, 08:28

1-800-CALL-SAM

I am outraged there is no warning label on popcorn.
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Post by tGreenWay 2014-06-18, 10:47

LoneWolfSparty wrote:Try flossing regularly, it toughens up your gums so you can handle things other than baby food without injury. Wussy.

I don't have time for that kind of commitment. Isn't there some kind of PED I can inject into my ass to strengthen my gums?
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Post by tGreenWay 2014-06-18, 10:50

MSU addict wrote:1-800-CALL-SAM

I am outraged there is no warning label on popcorn.

I, too, share your outrage. Unfortunately, attorney Bernstein kept saying I'd only get peanuts for a popcorn case. I think he was confused. After all, it was the blind one.
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Post by tGreenWay 2014-06-18, 10:56

MSU addict wrote:1-800-CALL-SAM

I am outraged there is no warning label on popcorn.

Bernstein also said that without an EMS/ambulance report, it was going to be pretty difficult to prove damages. I called 911, but they refused to send a crew retroactively. They also said I'm probably going to need a lawyer for bothering them. I said I got a good one from 1-800-CALL-SAM.
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