Re: Oh, Florida

by **Turtleneck** 2015-01-16, 11:07

Robert J Sakimano wrote:more strange news out of Florida.. (though I'm sure some folks here won't see a problem with it)..

Florida Cops Using Photos Of Black Men as Target Practice

At least he did not decapitate anybody or eat human flesh.

by **goodbar** 2015-01-16, 13:49

Robert J Sakimano wrote:more strange news out of Florida.. (though I'm sure some folks here won't see a problem with it)..

Florida Cops Using Photos Of Black Men as Target Practice

Well, if the police didn't get'em, the ebola would've.

by **Robert J Sakimano** 2015-01-16, 13:52

goodbar wrote:

Well, if the police didn't get'em, the ebola would've.

as long as it gets 'em before they vote..

by **Heat Miser** 2015-02-02, 18:43

Yeah, Florida has a corner on the idiot market. Rolling Eyes

Naked cowboy takes a jaunt down I-75 during snowstorm

by **Turtleneck** 2015-02-02, 19:18

Well, in Florida, naked highway walks are preceded by canibalism.

by **StylesGShmooth** 2015-02-03, 01:18

http://www.dailymail.co.uk/news/article-2934586/Man-SEX-dolphin-1970s-claims-new-film-performing-mammal-one-seduced-him.html

by Guest 2015-02-13, 10:44

A 17-year-old boy has undergone the world's first penis reduction surgery, surgeons claim.

The American teen requested the surgery after his penis grew too large, restricting his ability to have sex or play competitive sports.

The boy's surgeons were shocked when he came to them complaining that his penis was too big.

When flaccid, it measured almost seven inches in length and had a circumference of 10 inches - around the size of a grapefruit.

Surgeons described it as being shaped like an American football.

The surgeon who treated the teenager, Rafael Carrion, a urologist at the University of South Florida, told MailOnline: 'There comes a time in every urologist's career that a patient makes a request so rare and impossible to comprehend that all training breaks down and leaves the physician speechless.

Oh, Florida - Page 2 2599285600000578-2950409-image-a-5_1423732637476

http://www.dailymail.co.uk/health/article-2950409/World-s-penis-REDUCTION-surgery-Teenager-requested-op-genitals-grew-large-stopped-having-sex.html

by CheesySpartan 2015-02-13, 11:02

LooseGoose wrote:

http://www.dailymail.co.uk/health/article-2950409/World-s-penis-REDUCTION-surgery-Teenager-requested-op-genitals-grew-large-stopped-having-sex.html

Nothing to see here...I'm sure more than half the posters on the TSwill have to deal with this issue...

by **The_Dude** 2015-02-13, 11:12

Robert J Sakimano wrote:more strange news out of Florida.. (though I'm sure some folks here won't see a problem with it)..

Florida Cops Using Photos Of Black Men as Target Practice

I wonder why you forgot to mention this is standard practice and that the police also have multiple hispanic and white mug shots that they use?

Awww hell, fuck facts. Cue up the faux outrage machine!! Oh, Florida - Page 2 4198636888

by **InTenSity** 2015-02-13, 11:26

The_Dude wrote:

I wonder why you forgot to mention this is standard practice and that the police also have multiple hispanic and white mug shots that they use?

Awww hell, fuck facts. Cue up the faux outrage machine!!

Could you link to where it is standard practice to use real mugshots? The news down here made it sound as if this was not SOP, and the police departments will use generic targets, but not real mug shots.

by **Floyd Robertson** 2015-02-14, 07:54

OK, +1 for Florida on this one.

Sassy 80-Year-Old Cracks Up a Florida Courtroom

by **tTy** 2015-02-14, 11:23

Wait, people are shooting pieces of paper with printer toner on them in hopes of improving their marksmanship? I am really fucking super pissed off now.

by **Floyd Robertson** 2015-03-30, 17:34

SO: Orange County man breaks into ex's home, defecates on belongings

ORANGE COUNTY, Fla. —A family of four had a rude awakening Friday morning when the homeowner's ex broke in and defecated on several of the family's belongings, according to the Orange County Sheriff's Office.

Johnson is accused of defecating on the victim's bed sheets, a glass kitchen plate, a wallet and a dresser.

Johnson has obviously never heard of the upper decker.

by Brock Middlebrook 2015-03-31, 13:50

Rocinante wrote:
StylesGShmooth wrote:I'm foolishly hoping this won't get politcial but...

Oh, Florida

http://www.miamiherald.com/2014/07/25/4255428/curt-clawson-becomes-latest-flori.html

Yeah I started a thread over on swillbin since I couldn't see any way it couldn't. Guy is a fucking smug looking moran.

After reading the article, I googled this idiot to learn more about him...

Oh, Florida - Page 2 Images?q=tbn:ANd9GcTWbEzbfYQQPOeGYVGqzhT0EwST1Ur2XLP3bQrfGTc9YUSsm_2D

Oh, Florida - Page 2 Images?q=tbn:ANd9GcTWbEzbfYQQPOeGYVGqzhT0EwST1Ur2XLP3bQrfGTc9YUSsm_2D

by **Rocinante** 2015-05-01, 10:13

Florida Man, florida man. Does whatever he fucking wants....

Florida man hospitalized after attempt to kiss venomous snake

FLORIDA MAN HAD SEX WITH HIS PIT BULL IN FRONT OF HIS NEIGHBORS

by **Rocinante** 2015-05-01, 10:20

Man who had sex for a year with a captive Dolphin called Dolly speaks out about their year-long love affair in new documentary and claims SHE seduced him

by **SeeRockCity** 2015-05-01, 10:23

Rocinante wrote:Man who had sex for a year with a captive Dolphin called Dolly speaks out about their year-long love affair in new documentary and claims SHE seduced him

I was just in Florida (Tallahassee) for a business trip. Did a lot of fishing at some lake called "Piney-Z". I was approached by several large alligators who had funny looks in their eyes.

I can totally see how you could get taken advantage of by the wildlife there.

Don't even ask me about the sharks down in the big bend coast.

Florida needs to change their welcome signs to say "Welcome to Florida, you are now several notches down on the food chain".

by **Other Teams Pursuing That** 2015-05-01, 10:35

Rocinante wrote:Man who had sex for a year with a captive Dolphin called Dolly speaks out about their year-long love affair in new documentary and claims SHE seduced him

by **Rocinante** 2015-05-01, 10:40

Florida Man Breaks Into Ex’s Home, Poops on Everything

by **Heat Miser** 2015-05-01, 17:55

Florida Man Attempts To Cash $368 Billion Check

In addition to a forgery count, Waters was charged with unlawfully carrying Chinese throwing stars and possessing bath salts.

Oh, Florida - Page 2 Check-368billion-640-mug

by 75alum 2015-05-01, 20:11

Heat Miser wrote:Florida Man Attempts To Cash $368 Billion Check

In addition to a forgery count, Waters was charged with unlawfully carrying Chinese throwing stars and possessing bath salts.

Oxfam says he good for it

by **Turtleneck** 2015-05-01, 20:16

Heat Miser wrote:Florida Man Attempts To Cash $368 Billion Check

In addition to a forgery count, Waters was charged with unlawfully carrying Chinese throwing stars and possessing bath salts.

Looks like president of the downriver UM fan club.

by Brock Middlebrook 2015-05-05, 14:41

Florida Woman: http://www.clickorlando.com/news/woman-provided-drugs-had-sex-with-minor-police-say/32798950

by **Heat Miser** 2015-05-06, 10:22

And then there's Michigan:

Naked driver arrested after driving wrong way

Authorities say a naked woman driving the wrong way on a highway in Clare County led police on a chase before she was arrested.

Police say the 23-year-old woman from Harrison left behind her 32-year-old husband, who was also naked, and their child at a rest stop near Clare early Tuesday morning.

by Brock Middlebrook 2015-05-07, 12:14

http://woodtv.com/2015/05/07/parents-accused-of-giving-kids-drugs-as-bargaining-tool/

by **StylesGShmooth** 2015-05-09, 17:57

Man, the teachers and administrators at my HS were lame.

http://www.orlandosentinel.com/news/fl-principal-weed-arrest-20150507-story.html

by **InTenSity** 2015-05-26, 09:44

This is a somewhat terrifying story, but fortunately everyone is ok. Still a waterspout came off the water and picked up a bounce house with kids in it. You've probably seen the video by now.

Bounce House flies away

by **Robert J Sakimano** 2015-05-26, 09:50

InTenSity wrote:This is a somewhat terrifying story, but fortunately everyone is ok. Still a waterspout came off the water and picked up a bounce house with kids in it. You've probably seen the video by now.

Bounce House flies away

that's messed up.. pretty wild to watch. At first I was like "okay, so the thing turns over, big deal".. then it gets launched about 100 feet up in the air.. Shocked

.. the article said the kids fell out when it flipped... otherwise, that would've been one wild ride and likely would've turned out much different for them and their families.

by **InTenSity** 2015-05-26, 09:54

Robert J Sakimano wrote:
InTenSity wrote:This is a somewhat terrifying story, but fortunately everyone is ok. Still a waterspout came off the water and picked up a bounce house with kids in it. You've probably seen the video by now.

Bounce House flies away
that's messed up.. pretty wild to watch. At first I was like "okay, so the thing turns over, big deal".. then it gets launched about 100 feet up in the air.. .. the article said the kids fell out when it flipped... otherwise, that would've been one wild ride and likely would've turned out much different for them and their families.

The way it was portrayed on the news, I thought the kids were in the bounce house the entire time. My boss said he was in the area wondering why there were a lot of police and traffic was all backed up. Wasn't until he saw the news this morning that he realized why.

by **Robert J Sakimano** 2015-05-26, 09:58

InTenSity wrote:
Robert J Sakimano wrote:
that's messed up.. pretty wild to watch. At first I was like "okay, so the thing turns over, big deal".. then it gets launched about 100 feet up in the air.. .. the article said the kids fell out when it flipped... otherwise, that would've been one wild ride and likely would've turned out much different for them and their families.
The way it was portrayed on the news, I thought the kids were in the bounce house the entire time. My boss said he was in the area wondering why there were a lot of police and traffic was all backed up. Wasn't until he saw the news this morning that he realized why.

when I just watched the video, I assumed the kids were in it. Then I read the article.. I suspect their parents (provided that they were even paying attention) may have thought the kids were still in it, too.

by Guest 2015-05-30, 18:32

LAKE WALES (FOX 13) -

Police arrested an 82-year-old man for slashing a woman's tires because he claims she was sitting in his favorite bingo seat.

Fred Smith was charged with criminal mischief to a vehicle last week when, police say, he took an ice pick to Ethel Britt's van.

She celebrated her 88th birthday Friday and has since been questioning why Smith targeted her car.

82-year-old arrested for slashing tires over bingo

by **StylesGShmooth** 2015-05-30, 20:51

LooseGoose wrote:
LAKE WALES (FOX 13) -

Police arrested an 82-year-old man for slashing a woman's tires because he claims she was sitting in his favorite bingo seat.

Fred Smith was charged with criminal mischief to a vehicle last week when, police say, he took an ice pick to Ethel Britt's van.

She celebrated her 88th birthday Friday and has since been questioning why Smith targeted her car.

82-year-old arrested for slashing tires over bingo

Shit is real in them streets

by Guest 2015-06-15, 16:55

Wish we had stripper nurses in MI....

Cops: Florida nurse strips nude, attacks patient

PALM BAY, Fla. — A home health care nurse was taken into custody for observation Sunday after Palm Bay police said she stripped off her uniform and attacked a patient under her care.

The incident happened about 2 p.m. Sunday at a home on the 800 block of Hawaii Avenue after someone at the residence called police to report that the nurse removed her clothing and was acting erratically.

"It was in the patient's home. The patient was also battered," Lt. Greg Latulippe of the Palm Bay Police Department said. "The whole thing is unusual. We're also looking at charges."

The unidentified nurse was completely nude when officers arrived.

by **Floyd Robertson** 2015-06-26, 05:53

FLORIDA: Woman Stabs Boyfriend Because He Wouldn’t Have Sex With Her

Well, well, well we meet again Florida. You’ve actually been pretty quiet regarding alligatorshit crazy stories lately. It’s been nearly three weeks since a crackpot scenario came out of Florida. I believe the last encounter was a Florida man who was under the influence of some powerful substance that caused him to twerk to the musical stylings of Hall & Oates while on top of a cop car. Actually that was the very same day that a Florida man called 911 to brag about his muscles. Despite the short layoff, Florida is back and better than ever with a terrific WTF story of a woman stabbing her boyfriend for withholding the “D.”

by CheesySpartan 2015-07-08, 17:25

Florida man breaks ex-wife's sex toy in half, accuses her of 'cheating' on him with it: police

by **Rocinante** 2015-07-08, 21:54

Floyd Robertson wrote:FLORIDA: Woman Stabs Boyfriend Because He Wouldn’t Have Sex With Her

Well, well, well we meet again Florida. You’ve actually been pretty quiet regarding alligatorshit crazy stories lately. It’s been nearly three weeks since a crackpot scenario came out of Florida. I believe the last encounter was a Florida man who was under the influence of some powerful substance that caused him to twerk to the musical stylings of Hall & Oates while on top of a cop car. Actually that was the very same day that a Florida man called 911 to brag about his muscles. Despite the short layoff, Florida is back and better than ever with a terrific WTF story of a woman stabbing her boyfriend for withholding the “D.”

In.

by **InTenSity** 2015-07-30, 13:54

S. Florida leads in fraud
At least Miami-Dade and Broward are #1 at something! I've only had 2 credit card numbers stolen in 7 years down here. I do know someone who went to file a tax return only to find out they already had.

by Brock Middlebrook 2015-08-13, 10:45

http://truecrimetoday.blogspot.com/2015/08/man-tries-to-chew-off-his-fingerprints.html

by **Floyd Robertson** 2015-09-16, 06:01

FIU Foot Sniffer Arrested

Authorities have arrested the man wanted by Florida International University authorities for allegedly smelling women's feet on campus.

Eddy Juan, 52, was taken into custody on Tuesday afternoon in the area of Southwest 59th Street and Southwest 97th Court in Miami-Dade.

FIU Police sent out an alert on Monday, asking for the public's help identifying the man with an apparent foot fetish.

Police said he had been crawling underneath tables at the FIU Library to smell women's feet. He had been caught in the act in photos.

by **Turtleneck** 2015-10-06, 21:37

Libertarian candidate for Florida state senate once sacrificed a goat and drank its blood.

http://www.orlandosentinel.com/features/gone-viral/os-ap-florida-senate-sacrificing-goat-20151005-story.html?utm_source=Sailthru&utm_medium=email&utm_campaign=Vox%20Sentences%2010.5.15&utm_term=Vox%20Newsletter%20All

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