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Spartan Swill

A place on the internet to discuss MSU sports, raw milk, and English mustard, tell made up stories and generally act like an idiot when no one is watching. Sarcasm encouraged.


Ohio Man Arrested For Attempting to Have Sex With a Van..

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Ohio Man Arrested For Attempting to Have Sex With a Van.. Empty Ohio Man Arrested For Attempting to Have Sex With a Van..

Post by Robert J Sakimano Thu Aug 18, 2016 10:29 am

DAYTON, Ohio (WDTN) – Police arrested a man Tuesday night after a witness said they saw him trying to have sex with a parked van.


Man Arrested For Attempting To Have Sex With a Van
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Post by Robert J Sakimano Thu Aug 18, 2016 10:32 am

"get your motor running"..

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Post by Travis of the Cosmos Thu Aug 18, 2016 10:34 am

To be fair, it was a really nice van.
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Post by TheReal_LWS Thu Aug 18, 2016 10:45 am

Travis of the Cosmos wrote:To be fair, it was a really nice van.

So this article is about you.
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Post by Travis of the Cosmos Thu Aug 18, 2016 10:56 am

TheReal_LWS wrote:
Travis of the Cosmos wrote:To be fair, it was a really nice van.

So this article is about you.

Sure. Why not.
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Post by tGreenWay Thu Aug 18, 2016 11:03 am

Did he spank it with his rust belt?
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Post by Tim Wakefield Thu Aug 18, 2016 1:03 pm

Go Bucks baby
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Post by Other Teams Pursuing That Thu Aug 18, 2016 1:05 pm

Tim Wakefield wrote:Go Bucks baby

Ohio Man Arrested For Attempting to Have Sex With a Van.. JLQp6 - I O !
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Post by Robert J Sakimano Thu Aug 18, 2016 1:17 pm

I'd like to see the city of Dayton statue that makes it a crime to have sex with a parked vehicle.

I mean, how many innocent vehicles have been molested before some city council member wearing a short-sleeved 70/30 poly-blend shirt with a tie puts down his double whopper long enough to say "ya know, I'm tired of motor vehicles being sexualized"..
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Post by I.B. Fine Thu Aug 18, 2016 1:40 pm

Blanch thought he was sneaking up on his girl friend from behind.
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Post by Robert J Sakimano Thu Aug 18, 2016 1:46 pm

I.B. Fine wrote:Blanch thought he was sneaking up on his girl friend from behind.
Ohio Man Arrested For Attempting to Have Sex With a Van.. 502811600

he probably thought she was looking particularly sleek under the seductive illumination of Dayton street lights.



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Post by InTenSity Thu Aug 18, 2016 3:19 pm

I.B. Fine wrote:Blanch thought he was sneaking up on his girl friend from behind.
Ohio Man Arrested For Attempting to Have Sex With a Van.. 2376398117
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Post by TheReal_LWS Thu Aug 18, 2016 3:20 pm

Was this the van? Ohio Man Arrested For Attempting to Have Sex With a Van.. Jones-van-image
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Post by Watch Out Pylon! Thu Aug 18, 2016 3:21 pm

I.B. Fine wrote:Blanch thought he was sneaking up on his girl friend from behind.

+100 internets for you sir.
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Post by Turtleneck Thu Aug 18, 2016 3:24 pm

Surprised somebody has not blamed the van. That is usually what happens around here.
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Post by Cameron Thu Aug 18, 2016 3:24 pm

Wasn't clear to me from the article, was it his van, or somebody else's? Because if it's his van, he should be allowed to fuck it if he wants.
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Post by Turtleneck Thu Aug 18, 2016 3:26 pm

Cameron wrote:Wasn't clear to me from the article, was it his van, or somebody else's? Because if it's his van, he should be allowed to fuck it if he wants.

Vehicular incest is illegal is all 50 states.
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Post by Other Teams Pursuing That Thu Aug 18, 2016 3:37 pm

Turtleneck wrote:Surprised somebody has not blamed the van. That is usually what happens around here.

Maybe it should have been painted a different color.
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Post by Turtleneck Thu Aug 18, 2016 3:50 pm

Other Teams Pursuing That wrote:
Turtleneck wrote:Surprised somebody has not blamed the van. That is usually what happens around here.

Maybe it should have been painted a different color.

Or parked by other vans.
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Post by Cameron Thu Aug 18, 2016 3:51 pm

Turtleneck wrote:
Cameron wrote:Wasn't clear to me from the article, was it his van, or somebody else's? Because if it's his van, he should be allowed to fuck it if he wants.

Vehicular incest is illegal is all 50 states.
Link?
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Post by Robert J Sakimano Thu Aug 18, 2016 3:56 pm

Turtleneck wrote:Surprised somebody has not blamed the van. That is usually what happens around here.
we're waiting on our resident twisted misogynist LooseGoose to chime in.. I'd say if blaming women for being raped is something he's into, blaming the parked vehicle makes about as much sense.
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Post by Death Roe Fri Aug 19, 2016 1:12 am

Cameron wrote:Wasn't clear to me from the article, was it his van, or somebody else's? Because if it's his van, he should be allowed to fuck it if he wants.

LMAO
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