Past story about a typical Walverine - not sure this is even a "cool story bro"

gHost Spartan wrote:
Another time someone penetrated his asshole with a carrot as he was leaning over into a giant garbage-pail sized salad mixer.

gHost Spartan wrote:Back in the early 90s when I moved to Michigan I got a job picking cherries up in Traverse City. After the cherry picking season was over, I got a job as a cook at Grand Traverse Resort in Acme. Worked there for a quite a few years, starting out one full year while I was at NMC then when I went to MSU I came back and worked in the summers. Shit, it's already too long.

Every summer we would get a massive influx of college kids working at the Resort. One summer this total fuckhead tool walked in the kitchen on his first day wearing the Bo Michigan hat. Immediately I identified him as a douche. Long story short, the fucker was at Ferris and he got caught stealing a car radio or something during the school year while at Ferris. His dad was a huge cocksucker. Thought he was Bo. H.S. football coach at some small town in Northern Michigan. The kid was equally douchey - always talking smack about how much MSU sucked I said "dude you go to fucking Ferris!"

This kid used to pound soda from a 16oz bottle. Maybe 3-4 a day. He would open a bottle up, chug half of it, then put it down. Five minutes later finish it off. Dr. Pepper. One day I put about 1/4 cup of Liquid Smoke in his soda. He pounded it. Then immediately puked.

Another time someone penetrated his asshole with a carrot as he was leaning over into a giant garbage-pail sized salad mixer.

He was taking a shit once and we dumped a five gallon bucket of cantaloupe guts on him.

There were many more things too. But no matter what, he never learned to STFU.

He stayed in TC over the winter and had to spend I think six months in jail. My boss picked him up in the morning and took him to work, then back to jail later on. Despite all this, all the humiliation, he still talked shit.

I don't know whatever happened to that jackass. In a way, he was actually kind of fun to work with. Always angry and easily to tilt. I hope you're doing okay, Ray -

Turtleneck wrote:

gHost Spartan wrote:Back in the early 90s when I moved to Michigan I got a job picking cherries up in Traverse City. After the cherry picking season was over, I got a job as a cook at Grand Traverse Resort in Acme. Worked there for a quite a few years, starting out one full year while I was at NMC then when I went to MSU I came back and worked in the summers. Shit, it's already too long.

Every summer we would get a massive influx of college kids working at the Resort. One summer this total fuckhead tool walked in the kitchen on his first day wearing the Bo Michigan hat. Immediately I identified him as a douche. Long story short, the fucker was at Ferris and he got caught stealing a car radio or something during the school year while at Ferris. His dad was a huge cocksucker. Thought he was Bo. H.S. football coach at some small town in Northern Michigan. The kid was equally douchey - always talking smack about how much MSU sucked I said "dude you go to fucking Ferris!"

This kid used to pound soda from a 16oz bottle. Maybe 3-4 a day. He would open a bottle up, chug half of it, then put it down. Five minutes later finish it off. Dr. Pepper. One day I put about 1/4 cup of Liquid Smoke in his soda. He pounded it. Then immediately puked.

Another time someone penetrated his asshole with a carrot as he was leaning over into a giant garbage-pail sized salad mixer.

He was taking a shit once and we dumped a five gallon bucket of cantaloupe guts on him.

There were many more things too. But no matter what, he never learned to STFU.

He stayed in TC over the winter and had to spend I think six months in jail. My boss picked him up in the morning and took him to work, then back to jail later on. Despite all this, all the humiliation, he still talked shit.

I don't know whatever happened to that jackass. In a way, he was actually kind of fun to work with. Always angry and easily to tilt. I hope you're doing okay, Ray -

What town was he from?

The Pantry wrote:Started a new job today. Guy in the cube next to mine is sorta chatty but seemed nice enough...until late in the day when he mentioned he was a Walvie and started rambling how Harblah was going to change things. Said Friday will be a rough day for him if they lose.

Went on to predict Jeem will have them in the playoff in 3 years after he gets his own croots in. Felt like rolling my eyes but decided not to on the first day and said something like "we'll see" and went on to question why the 49ers owner seemed to hate him. He replied with some BS about Stanford and that NFL players don't like his coaching style because they make so much cash.

Contemplating ways to make his Friday even worse after Utah kicks their ass. Open to suggestions

kingstonlake wrote:Cum in his coffee