My pee smells funky: Please make a diagnosis

by **tGreenWay** 2016-01-06, 18:01

Haven't had asparagus in weeks, haven't eaten any out-of-the-ordinary foods, and typically drink 32-48 ozs. of water daily. What's causing this?

by **I.B. Fine** 2016-01-06, 18:01

Menopause

by **Travis of the Cosmos** 2016-01-06, 18:02

What kind of funny? Like a clown funny?

by **The Pantry** 2016-01-06, 18:02

You gone...

by **Dendrobates** 2016-01-06, 18:02

UTI or STD?

Either way. You gone

by **Turtleneck** 2016-01-06, 18:02

Have you eaten any asparagus or out-of-the-ordinary foods? How much water are you drinking?

by **I.B. Fine** 2016-01-06, 18:04

The mood swings were the giveaway. Next will be hot flashes
My pee smells funky: Please make a diagnosis 4198636888

by **Turtleneck** 2016-01-06, 18:05

Is this connected to your seasonal body aches and 6hr naps?

by **tGreenWay** 2016-01-06, 18:06

Turtleneck wrote:Have you eaten any asparagus or out-of-the-ordinary foods? How much water are you drinking?

Gimme a minute to think about this.

by **Rocinante** 2016-01-06, 18:06

You have a cold coming on. Take large quantities of vitamin c and for God's sake, stop masturbating.

by **tGreenWay** 2016-01-06, 18:07

I.B. Fine wrote:Menopause

That would explain the mood swings. I fear the impending hot flashes.

by **tGreenWay** 2016-01-06, 18:09

Turtleneck wrote:Is this connected to your seasonal body aches and 6hr naps?

I have seasonal body arches. I get in these moods to hunch my back or extend my arms upward while simultaneously leaning backward.

by **tGreenWay** 2016-01-06, 18:10

Rocinante wrote:You have a cold coming on. Take large quantities of vitamin c and for God's sake, stop masturbating.

That's advice I hope to never hear from my doc.

by **tGreenWay** 2016-01-06, 18:21

Dendrobates wrote:UTI or STD?

Either way. You gone

I didn't realize a real He-man such as myself could get a UTI. Must be an STD.

by **Code_Warrior** 2016-01-06, 18:23

In my expert medical opinion, I think you should stop smelling your pee. And fergodsakes don't drink it.

by **Turtleneck** 2016-01-06, 18:23

tGreenWay wrote:
Turtleneck wrote:Have you eaten any asparagus or out-of-the-ordinary foods? How much water are you drinking?

Gimme a minute to think about this.

My pee smells funky: Please make a diagnosis I-am-waiting

by **tGreenWay** 2016-01-06, 18:27

Code_Warrior wrote:In my expert medical opinion, I think you should stop smelling your pee. And fergodsakes don't drink it.

It was the dog that pointed it out. She always goes up to the terlet before I flush. The last couple of times she's run out of the batroom with her tail between her legs.

As for drinking it; only in an emergency, and I have a shelf full of Mason jars filled with my urine downstairs, just in case there's a water shortage. So I'm good.

by **tGreenWay** 2016-01-06, 18:27

Turtleneck wrote:
tGreenWay wrote:

Gimme a minute to think about this.

I'm still pondering your questions. Gimme a minute.

by **DWags** 2016-01-06, 18:40

I know we fuck around about his shit. But I'm serious, if you're not joking go to a doctor. My father waited, we all laughed when he said "shit my urine smells funny" he ended up with cancer. Your liver filters shit, it could be something simple, like what you are or drank, it could be something not so simple. From something I just googled:

When you notice that your urine has changed color, or there's a strange odor wafting up from the toilet, the cause might be something as harmless as what you had for dinner (which could have included beets or asparagus). It also might be a sign of a more serious condition, such as an infection or cancer.

Alright, fuck you wags, enough of the serious shit, lets go back to joking.

by **The Pantry** 2016-01-06, 19:12

Thanks for ruining a funky pee thread, Dwags

by **Travis of the Cosmos** 2016-01-06, 19:21

Dwags- thanks for ruining everything

Greenway- please go to the doctor. I love you.

Pylon?- eat shit and die

by **Other Teams Pursuing That** 2016-01-06, 19:36

Can we put Travis on stealth mode yet? He is ruining the board.

by **Dendrobates** 2016-01-06, 19:41

tGreenWay wrote:
Dendrobates wrote:UTI or STD?

Either way. You gone

While not common with men. It can and does happen.

I didn't realize a real He-man such as myself could get a UTI. Must be an STD.

by **Travis of the Cosmos** 2016-01-06, 20:06

Other Teams Pursuing That wrote:Can we put Travis on stealth mode yet? He is ruining the board.

Im glad to hear that I'm not already! Wwwwoooooooooooo!!!!

by **tGreenWay** 2016-01-06, 20:45

DWags wrote:I know we fuck around about his shit. But I'm serious, if you're not joking go to a doctor. My father waited, we all laughed when he said "shit my urine smells funny" he ended up with cancer. Your liver filters shit, it could be something simple, like what you are or drank, it could be something not so simple. From something I just googled:

When you notice that your urine has changed color, or there's a strange odor wafting up from the toilet, the cause might be something as harmless as what you had for dinner (which could have included beets or asparagus). It also might be a sign of a more serious condition, such as an infection or cancer.

Alright, fuck you wags, enough of the serious shit, lets go back to joking.

Thanks for the info and concern. I'm going to give this a couple more days and if it hasn't cleared up I'll make an appointment.

by **Turtleneck** 2016-01-06, 20:47

Well, now that DWags has ruined the board what does everybody want to do?

by **tGreenWay** 2016-01-06, 20:49

Dendrobates wrote:
tGreenWay wrote:

While not common with men. It can and does happen.

I didn't realize a real He-man such as myself could get a UTI. Must be an STD.

Between DWags' serious comment and your straight talk, I'm starting to freak out, Dendro. Can you come over and comfort me? I could really use your finger in my butt right now.

by **tGreenWay** 2016-01-06, 20:50

Turtleneck wrote:Well, now that DWags has ruined the board what does everybody want to do?

Dendro and I have plans.

by **The Pantry** 2016-01-06, 20:52

Turtleneck wrote:Well, now that DWags has ruined the board what does everybody want to do?

I'm sure all you pussies will go running to the doctor. Not me. My pee has smelled funky all my life.

Fuck doctors. Fuck the pharmaceutical companies. And...fuck Obamacare.

by **tGreenWay** 2016-01-06, 20:53

Travis of the Cosmos wrote:Dwags- thanks for ruining everything

Greenway- please go to the doctor. I love you.

Pylon?- eat shit and die

What about Goymer?

by **tGreenWay** 2016-01-06, 20:55

The Pantry wrote:
Turtleneck wrote:Well, now that DWags has ruined the board what does everybody want to do?
I'm sure all you pussies will go running to the doctor. Not me. My pee has smelled funky all my life.

Fuck doctors. Fuck the pharmaceutical companies. And...fuck Obamacare.

Your pee smells funky because of all the shit you drink in your stanky milk.

by **The Pantry** 2016-01-06, 21:05

tGreenWay wrote:
The Pantry wrote:I'm sure all you pussies will go running to the doctor. Not me. My pee has smelled funky all my life.

Fuck doctors. Fuck the pharmaceutical companies. And...fuck Obamacare.

Your pee smells funky because of all the shit you drink in your stanky milk.

Fuck you. My preferred type of milk gently sours with age and can still be consumed. Your skank milk goes rancid after the expiration date and could easily kill you. I win Basketball

by **Turtleneck** 2016-01-06, 21:11

I don't drink rape, Pantry.

by **The Pantry** 2016-01-06, 21:13

Turtleneck wrote:I don't drink rape, Pantry.

1%

by **tGreenWay** 2016-01-06, 23:18

The Pantry wrote:
tGreenWay wrote:

Your pee smells funky because of all the shit you drink in your stanky milk.
Fuck you. My preferred type of milk gently sours with age and can still be consumed. Your skank milk goes rancid after the expiration date and could easily kill you. I win

I don't drink cow's milk at all. I drink raped almonds. Way better tasting, far fewer calories, and I don't get any of that nasty phlegmy aftersputum.

by **tGreenWay** 2016-01-06, 23:18

So, I guess I win.

by **The Pantry** 2016-01-06, 23:32

After thorough testing, my milk helps prevent sunburn. Never had a problem but others have said it also alleviates lactose intolerance.

I win

by **tGreenWay** 2016-01-06, 23:50

The Pantry wrote:After thorough testing, my milk helps prevent sunburn. Never had a problem but others have said it also alleviates lactose intolerance.

I win

Do you spray it on or use one of those turkey basters?

by **Gomer** 2016-01-06, 23:59

Sounds like you have an acute case of stinky pee My pee smells funky: Please make a diagnosis 2599972566

by **Gomer** 2016-01-07, 00:02

The Pantry wrote:
tGreenWay wrote:

Your pee smells funky because of all the shit you drink in your stanky milk.
Fuck you. My preferred type of milk gently sours with age and can still be consumed. Your skank milk goes rancid after the expiration date and could easily kill you. I win

I just killed a gallon of milk from Costco that was 10 days past date I shit you not and there were no problems with it.

The critical component of milk freshness is keeping it cold. Lowest part of the fridge, at the back. Don't leave it out. Even 5 degrees of difference for a few hours makes a tremendous difference.

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