Birds aren’t real

by **tGreenWay** Thu Apr 16, 2020 9:02 pm

They’re surveillance drones. Real birds were murdered by the billions starting in the mid-70s. This group has been around since shortly after that, when word leaked out about the avian genocide. They’re spreading the word that we’re all being spied on by what looks like birds, but aren’t.
Just remember, bird watching goes both ways.

birdsarentreal.com

by **Floyd Robertson** Thu Apr 16, 2020 9:04 pm

I can't wait to see this guy eat crow.

by **CORNER BLITZ** Thu Apr 16, 2020 9:10 pm

The real reason for the quarantine is that the government has to replace all the batteries in the "birds"

by **tGreenWay** Thu Apr 16, 2020 9:21 pm

Floyd Robertson wrote:I can't wait to see this guy eat crow.

Boo! Booooo!

by **tGreenWay** Thu Apr 16, 2020 9:22 pm

CORNER BLITZ wrote:The real reason for the quarantine is that the government has to replace all the batteries in the "birds"

Floyd, you might want to take some notes on CB’s material.

by **Turtleneck** Thu Apr 16, 2020 9:36 pm

I imagine that is what OTPT looks like. I actually think that is OTPT. I don't see how it's not OTPT.

by **Rocinante** Thu Apr 16, 2020 9:48 pm

This guy is crazy. It’s not the birds it’s the squirrels.

by **y2kMgrad** Thu Apr 16, 2020 9:58 pm

It's good to see millennials are finally leaving the nest.

by AvgMSUJoe Thu Apr 16, 2020 10:05 pm

This is the conclusion of the social media experience. Someone turn off the lights.

by **tGreenWay** Thu Apr 16, 2020 10:57 pm

AvgMSUJoe wrote:This is the conclusion of the social media experience. Someone turn off the lights.

Balderdash. This group started way before Al Gore invented the internets.

by **tGreenWay** Thu Apr 16, 2020 10:59 pm

y2kMgrad wrote:It's good to see millennials are finally leaving the nest.

Please go stand with Floyd.

by **tGreenWay** Thu Apr 16, 2020 11:00 pm

Rocinante wrote:This guy is crazy. It’s not the birds it’s the squirrels.

You’re embarrassing yourself.

by **Nordic** Thu Apr 16, 2020 11:14 pm

What does a cat call a hummingbird?

Spoiler:

by **y2kMgrad** Thu Apr 16, 2020 11:20 pm

tGreenWay wrote:
y2kMgrad wrote:It's good to see millennials are finally leaving the nest.

Please go stand with Floyd.

Just saying, I think this kid might be the next Steven Hawking.

by **tGreenWay** Thu Apr 16, 2020 11:49 pm

y2kMgrad wrote:
tGreenWay wrote:

Please go stand with Floyd.

Just saying, I think this kid might be the next Steven Hawking.

Well played.

by **Floyd Robertson** Fri Apr 17, 2020 5:06 am

Nordic wrote:What does a cat call a hummingbird?

Spoiler:

by **DWags** Fri Apr 17, 2020 5:18 am

Guess what I ordered from the website?

by Senior Dickfist Fri Apr 17, 2020 9:53 am

DWags wrote:Guess what I ordered from the website?

That's awesome. I've been looking for a new hat and I think you just got the best one on the interwebs!

by Senior Dickfist Fri Apr 17, 2020 9:56 am

I'm going to get one too. That way, when we see each other at Spartan events both wearing our "Birds Aren't Real" hats, we can give each other the secret tSwill nod and wink, knowing that we are in good company.

by **Watch Out Pylon!** Fri Apr 17, 2020 10:02 am

Nordic wrote:What does a cat call a hummingbird?

Spoiler:

Thanks dad.

by **Turtleneck** Fri Apr 17, 2020 10:12 am

I wonder if Nordic yells at his kids when they can’t pick up heavy objects.

“WTF, little Nordic? Pick up that boulder and carry it over that mountain. NOW! No crying. Pain is weakness leaving the body. Damn kids these days.”

by **tGreenWay** Fri Apr 17, 2020 10:14 am

Senior Dickfist wrote:I'm going to get one too. That way, when we see each other at Spartan events both wearing our "Birds Aren't Real" hats, we can give each other the secret tSwill nod and wink, knowing that we are in good company.

But surrounded by thousands of robot birds. Birds aren’t real 1550444538

by **tGreenWay** Fri Apr 17, 2020 10:16 am

Nordic wrote:What does a cat call a hummingbird?

Spoiler:

Don’t listen to Pylon. He doesn’t know funny.

by Senior Dickfist Fri Apr 17, 2020 10:24 am

tGreenWay wrote:
Senior Dickfist wrote:I'm going to get one too. That way, when we see each other at Spartan events both wearing our "Birds Aren't Real" hats, we can give each other the secret tSwill nod and wink, knowing that we are in good company.

But surrounded by thousands of robot birds.

Depending on which side you are on, the birds can be a friend.

by **tGreenWay** Fri Apr 17, 2020 10:41 am

Senior Dickfist wrote:
tGreenWay wrote:

But surrounded by thousands of robot birds.

Depending on which side you are on, the birds can be a friend.

I knew you’d sell out to the robot overlords. Traitor.

by **Travis of the Cosmos** Fri Apr 17, 2020 10:43 am

If birds were real and the earth was actually a globe flying around the sun at 67,000 mph (lol fat chance) then if they were flying the same direction as the earth they’d be moving at like 67,150 mph and their brains would explode. Obviously neither of these things is true. #facts #useyourownhead #fucknasa #globies

by **CORNER BLITZ** Fri Apr 17, 2020 11:14 am

Travis of the Cosmos wrote:If birds were real and the earth was actually a globe flying around the sun at 67,000 mph (lol fat chance) then if they were flying the same direction as the earth they’d be moving at like 67,150 mph and their brains would explode. Obviously neither of these things is true. #facts #useyourownhead #fucknasa #globies

by **tGreenWay** Fri Apr 17, 2020 11:16 am

Travis of the Cosmos wrote:If birds were real and the earth was actually a globe flying around the sun at 67,000 mph (lol fat chance) then if they were flying the same direction as the earth they’d be moving at like 67,150 mph and their brains would explode. Obviously neither of these things is true. #facts #useyourownhead #fucknasa #globies

Exactly! And then those robot birds would burst into flames.
Plus, that whole earth is traveling at 67,000 mph is malarkey. Nobody has invented a speedometer that goes as high as 67,000 mph, so there’s no way to clock how fast we’re going.

by Senior Dickfist Fri Apr 17, 2020 11:25 am

tGreenWay wrote:
Travis of the Cosmos wrote:If birds were real and the earth was actually a globe flying around the sun at 67,000 mph (lol fat chance) then if they were flying the same direction as the earth they’d be moving at like 67,150 mph and their brains would explode. Obviously neither of these things is true. #facts #useyourownhead #fucknasa #globies

Exactly! And then those robot birds would burst into flames.
Plus, that whole earth is traveling at 67,000 mph is malarkey. Nobody has invented a speedometer that goes as high as 67,000 mph, so there’s no way to clock how fast we’re going.

Dang, Travis got to you too? Did he slip you some of his fucking oatmeal?

by **DWags** Fri Apr 17, 2020 11:37 am

Senior Dickfist wrote:I'm going to get one too. That way, when we see each other at Spartan events both wearing our "Birds Aren't Real" hats, we can give each other the secret tSwill nod and wink, knowing that we are in good company.

by **Watch Out Pylon!** Fri Apr 17, 2020 12:50 pm

Turtleneck wrote:I wonder if Nordic yells at his kids when they can’t pick up heavy objects.

“WTF, little Nordic? Pick up that boulder and carry it over that mountain. NOW! No crying. Pain is weakness leaving the body. Damn kids these days.”

Nordic's back yard.

by **Turtleneck** Fri Apr 17, 2020 1:55 pm

That's what I picture it looking like. I bet his real name is Magnus.

by **tGreenWay** Fri Apr 17, 2020 3:58 pm

Meanwhile, Nordy has his little girl on a slightly different workout regimen:

by **Nordic** Fri Apr 17, 2020 8:08 pm

This make Nordic sad Birds aren’t real 4177874726

by **tGreenWay** Fri Apr 17, 2020 9:01 pm

Nordic wrote:This make Nordic sad

Why Nordy, why so sad?

by **CORNER BLITZ** Fri Jul 17, 2020 2:01 pm

[ig]CCgX-LsFkzM[/ig]

by **Rocinante** Fri Jul 17, 2020 3:28 pm

tGreenWay wrote:Meanwhile, Nordy has his little girl on a slightly different workout regimen:

I would whip that girl’s ass.

by **kingstonlake** Fri Jul 17, 2020 4:21 pm

This thread never really got its wings.

So sad to see Greenway’s IMB decline play out so publicly Birds aren’t real 2809484752

by **MiamiSpartan** Fri Jul 17, 2020 6:22 pm

CORNER BLITZ wrote:[ig]CCgX-LsFkzM[/ig]

What about ducks ? These two ducks have been setting up shop in my front yard every couple of days for a few weeks. Just sitting there, doing nothing. Verrrryyyy suspicious.

by **Rocinante** Fri Jul 17, 2020 6:54 pm

Edit: assuming she hasn’t grown at all. If she’s an adult. Or even a teen I’d have to re-evaluate.

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