tOfficial tSwill Inventions Thread

[SawGreen]

I've got an actual good one that I will photo tomorrow and post.  But after attending an event this evening, I've decided to print these business cards and place them on cars who are in violation.

Place your inventions in this thread.

[Rocinante]

I invented rollerblades

[Bagger Vance]

I've got an actual good one that I will photo tomorrow and post.  But after attending an event this evening, I've decided to print these business cards and place them on cars who are in violation.

Place your inventions in this thread.

I like these and these better.

[Bill Cain]

somebody needs to find a new chemical substance that's better than asphalt/concrete for our streets. It's ridiculous how much road repair has to be done after just one winter.

But then again....that'll take err jerbs...

[SawGreen]

Popped this together the other day.  If I remember, it took 6 - 8' 2x4 and half a plastic barrel.

Works great!

[Rodeo Burger]

Popped this together the other day.  If I remember, it took 6 - 8' 2x4 and half a plastic barrel.

Works great!

What exactly does it do?

  

[Cosmo_Kramer]

What about an invention to keep drinks cold in the car during hot weather? My green tea got piss warm after I ran into the store for 15 minutes...pissed me off

[Rocinante]

I've been working on an alternative to toilet paper for 20 years.

I was inspired by the shells in the movie Demolition Man.

[goodbar]

What exactly does it do?

  

Kick-ass fixture for cutting down multiple branches @ a time to fit into fireplace/firepit?

[SawGreen]

What exactly does it do?

  

Holds a generous supply of raw sticks and lumber with the center gap around 16 to 17" for easy chain-sawing.

[WhiteBoyHatcher]

I've been working on an alternative to toilet paper for 20 years.  

I was inspired by the shells in the movie Demolition Man.

I have this in my basement bathroom. I wouldn't want to live without it. I can't. I won't.



http://www.amazon.com/Luxe-MB110-Non-Electric-Mechanical-Attachment/dp/product-description/B001KKRCFA

[Rocinante]

I have this in my basement bathroom. I wouldn't want to live without it. I can't. I won't.



http://www.amazon.com/Luxe-MB110-Non-Electric-Mechanical-Attachment/dp/product-description/B001KKRCFA

See, I think Bidets are awesome, but the problem is that your ass is wet. I'm looking for a way around that for use in public places and such. I'm going to be fucking rich, bitches.

[WhiteBoyHatcher]

See, I think Bidets are awesome, but the problem is that your ass is wet.  I'm looking for a way around that for use in public places and such.  I'm going to be fucking rich, bitches.

The spray stream is very direct and concentrated, so really only your asshole gets wet. Sit there for a minute, let your winking starfish drip dry, stand up, dab dry with toilet paper, and you're good to go.

[tanfan!]

The spray stream is very direct and concentrated, so really only your asshole gets wet. Sit there for a minute, let your winking starfish drip dry, stand up, dab dry with toilet paper, and you're good to go.

Winking star fish. BWAAAAAAAAAAAAA  

[Rodeo Burger]

The spray stream is very direct and concentrated, so really only your asshole gets wet. Sit there for a minute, let your winking starfish drip dry, stand up, dab dry with toilet paper, and you're good to go.

Bidets are magic. They some how hit you right in the ass hole, no matter what your shape or size.

[Rocinante]

The spray stream is very direct and concentrated, so really only your asshole gets wet. Sit there for a minute, let your winking starfish drip dry, stand up, dab dry with toilet paper, and you're good to go.

Sorry not good enough.

I mean. I had one in my old house (a real bidet) and It was glorious, but I'm going big. I'll buy you all when I hit the jackpot.

[SawGreen]

Winking star fish.  BWAAAAAAAAAAAAA  

This !!     

[DWags]

Battery power, christmas bulb smoke detector.

No more messy christmas tree fires where all the children get burnt to a crisp ruining the family holiday. This is a fancy bulb, made into decorative college bulbs, but it is also a smoke detector.

Tree starts to burn, it goes off immediately.

[The Lonely Stoner]

I've always wanted to make an app where you can instantaneously take a photo on your phone or blackberry and have it upload on the line.

[WhiteBoyHatcher]

Uhh, Flickr will do that bruh.

[Spartan G. Thug]

I've always wanted to make an app where you can instantaneously take a photo on your phone or blackberry and have it upload on the line.

you should intern at google

[Rocinante]

Uhh, Flickr will do that bruh.

[Gomer]

Battery power, christmas bulb smoke detector.  

No more messy christmas tree fires where all the children get burnt to a crisp ruining the family holiday.   This is a fancy bulb, made into decorative college bulbs, but it is also a smoke detector.  

Tree starts to burn, it goes off immediately.  

Meh... Rig one of these onto the star on the top:


Attach garden hose to the bottom. BANGO! no more fire!

If you want to get really fancy, rig automatic watering system.

As for the ugly hose? Hide it in a model train track.

or.....**** the christmas tree and throw up the Festivus Pole and call it a day   

[SawGreen]

Ok, here's one for hikers.

I picture a "backpack shroud", very easily attached to/removed from a backpack.  But, it has some built in items like co2 powered jet stream whistles, some kind of ultra white strobe flash function, and any other lightweight item that contributes to general mayhem.

When the bear approaches, you pull a rip cord and set it all off.

(personally, I would just carry a handgun)

[SeeRockCity]

Ok, here's one for hikers.

I picture a "backpack shroud", very easily attached to/removed from a backpack.  But, it has some built in items like co2 powered jet stream whistles, some kind of ultra white strobe flash function, and any other lightweight item that contributes to general mayhem.

When the bear approaches, you pull a rip cord and set it all off.

(personally, I would just carry a handgun)

I would buy one if it were available in a codpiece. "Deploying countermeasure {squelch}, over"

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