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Spartan Swill

A place on the internet to discuss MSU sports, raw milk, and English mustard, tell made up stories and generally act like an idiot when no one is watching. Sarcasm encouraged.


You've Been Pooping All Wrong...

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Spartan Swill :: Discussions :: Beaumont Tower (Main Board)

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Panic You've Been Pooping All Wrong...

Post by Heat Miser Mon Sep 22, 2014 10:36 am

You've Been Pooping All Wrong

You're supposed to squat when you poop. Did you hear me? Squatting. While pooping. Is the way to do it. Not this hunching-over thing you're doing now which takes forever and is not nature's way. Everyone else has figured it out and you are the last person still retro-pooping, so let's get you on the right path.
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Panic Re: You've Been Pooping All Wrong...

Post by AvgMSUJoe Mon Sep 22, 2014 10:40 am

Heat Miser wrote:You've Been Pooping All Wrong


And how does this make me avoid work and screw around on the phone for longer periods of time?
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Panic Re: You've Been Pooping All Wrong...

Post by LoneWolfSparty Mon Sep 22, 2014 10:45 am

You poop your way, I'll poop mine.
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Panic Re: You've Been Pooping All Wrong...

Post by NigelUno Mon Sep 22, 2014 10:49 am

The Squatty Potty!!!

We had those at the Swill tailgate on Saturday. Great times.
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Panic Re: You've Been Pooping All Wrong...

Post by 75alum Mon Sep 22, 2014 11:03 am

Been there, didn't do that..............You've Been Pooping All Wrong... Th?&id=HN.608017487937404966&w=300&h=300&c=0&pid=1
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Panic Re: You've Been Pooping All Wrong...

Post by Mentalstate Mon Sep 22, 2014 11:08 am

Ah, shit.
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Panic Re: You've Been Pooping All Wrong...

Post by 85Grad Mon Sep 22, 2014 11:24 am

One of the best documentaries I ever saw was called The Natural History of the Water Closet, back around 1980. I still remember a defecation expert explaining why the "squatting slab" used in India and southeast Asia (essentially a platform with a hole in it) is superior to the toilet.
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Panic Re: You've Been Pooping All Wrong...

Post by 75alum Mon Sep 22, 2014 11:30 am

Found squat hole I might use. Even better it's BOGOYou've Been Pooping All Wrong... Th?&id=HN.608023977624471991&w=300&h=300&c=0&pid=1
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Panic Re: You've Been Pooping All Wrong...

Post by Murphy Green Mon Sep 22, 2014 12:03 pm

Dr. Oz demonstrated the squatting technique today.
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Panic Re: You've Been Pooping All Wrong...

Post by Blanch32 Mon Sep 22, 2014 12:05 pm

I got a squatty. Uncomfortable as shit and only marginally better. Plus you look like a total tool while using it.

Best for those clingers
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Panic Re: You've Been Pooping All Wrong...

Post by SawGreen Mon Sep 22, 2014 11:08 pm

Da fuq do I care about 79 seconds?  I'm checking email or scores, or pron.  


Not to mention, wouldn't leaning a little further forward properly align your puborectalis?


Aw hell, I'll carry a stool to work, to work out my stool.


You've Been Pooping All Wrong... Stool10
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Panic Re: You've Been Pooping All Wrong...

Post by Death Roe Tue Sep 23, 2014 6:48 pm

Does shitting in a urinal count? I've done that a few times.
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Panic Re: You've Been Pooping All Wrong...

Post by Snake Plissken Tue Sep 23, 2014 6:49 pm

Why are you watching me poop?
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Panic Re: You've Been Pooping All Wrong...

Post by Heat Miser Tue Sep 23, 2014 7:29 pm

Snake Plissken wrote:Why are you watching me poop?

To make sure you're doing it properly.
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Panic Re: You've Been Pooping All Wrong...

Post by LoneWolfSparty Tue Sep 23, 2014 7:32 pm

I squatted when I pooped on the free scum tickets.
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Panic Re: You've Been Pooping All Wrong...

Post by Snake Plissken Tue Sep 23, 2014 7:38 pm

Heat Miser wrote:

To make sure you're doing it properly.
You could have just said something instead of making this thread. This is much more embarrassing for me
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Panic Re: You've Been Pooping All Wrong...

Post by Blanch32 Tue Sep 23, 2014 8:22 pm

Using squatty right now. ****ing turd is stuck and I'm falling in!!!
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Panic Re: You've Been Pooping All Wrong...

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