When is date #3?

 

lolz. she's out of town this weekend for a funeral. but she has happened to text me the most inane shit that i am totally uninterested in. so get this. she likes spiders but not frogs. she doesn't like chocolate but she likes gummy bears. and she doesn't like thick crust pizza.

uhm, who gives a f*ck. just shut your pie hole and spread your legs. i don't really care what's going on in that unbalanced noodle of yours. i'm not indifferent about it. it actually pains me to hear it.

so in the mean time i get a reprieve this weekend. 2 faulking dates and i'm already enjoying our time apart.

 

"and the Lord sayeth unto her: grant him who endurith barrage of soulless texts entrance into thine poophole"

-Peter 6:9

AMwood wrote:lolz. she's out of town this weekend for a funeral. but she has happened to text me the most inane shit that i am totally uninterested in. so get this. she likes spiders but not frogs. she doesn't like chocolate but she likes gummy bears. and she doesn't like thick crust pizza.

uhm, who gives a f*ck. just shut your pie hole and spread your legs. i don't really care what's going on in that unbalanced noodle of yours. i'm not indifferent about it. it actually pains me to hear it.

so in the mean time i get a reprieve this weekend. 2 faulking dates and i'm already enjoying our time apart.

At this rate you'll score with her after this many dates:

Random number (12,24) : 13

goodbar wrote:"and the Lord sayeth unto her: grant him who endurith barrage of soulless texts entrance into thine poophole"

-Peter 6:9

   

goodbar wrote:"and the Lord sayeth unto her: grant him who endurith barrage of soulless texts entrance into thine poophole"

-Peter 6:9

  

goodbar wrote:"and the Lord sayeth unto her: grant him who endurith barrage of soulless texts entrance into thine poophole"

-Peter 6:9

   

she's texted me a picture of a mimosa this morning. after a little back and forth she said "well, i've got to get in the shower" and i'm all like "forget the mimosa pics i want a picture of that"

but she said no. should i break up with her?

AMwood wrote:she's texted me a picture of a mimosa this morning.  after a little back and forth she said "well, i've got to get in the shower" and i'm all like "forget the mimosa pics i want a picture of that"

but she said no. should i break up with her?

Not yet. There is more entertainment for the rest of us that this "relationship" can most certainly provide.

Tell her the other girls you're dating didn't have any problem with it, and she needs to play by the rules if she wants a third date

AMwood wrote:she's texted me a picture of a mimosa this morning.  after a little back and forth she said "well, i've got to get in the shower" and i'm all like "forget the mimosa pics i want a picture of that"

but she said no. should i break up with her?

Keep her on the line. The screen play is practically writing itself.

okay, so this is going to be a swill relationship. i will try to document as much of it as i can. up until the part of me getting all up in that. then the story needs to go dark.

AMwood wrote:okay, so this is going to be a swill relationship. i will try to document as much of it as i can. up until the part of me getting all up in that. then the story needs to go dark.

photo journalism?

AMwood wrote:okay, so this is going to be a swill relationship. i will try to document as much of it as i can. up until the part of me getting all up in that. then the story needs to go dark.

Just as long as no personal information gets posted.

Yeah, I get to be that guy.   

SeeRockCity wrote:

Just as long as no personal information gets posted.

Yeah, I get to be that guy.    

you mean like smells and stuff?

AMwood wrote:she's texted me a picture of a mimosa this morning. after a little back and forth she said "well, i've got to get in the shower" and i'm all like "forget the mimosa pics i want a picture of that"

but she said no. should i break up with her?

Only one thing to be done, send her a picture of your schlong.

AMwood wrote:

SeeRockCity wrote:

Just as long as no personal information gets posted.

Yeah, I get to be that guy.    

you mean like smells and stuff?

No no, both smells and stuff are perfectly fine.

Yes, as others have already said, keep this going for us. We know its early and everything but it just seems like there's something there, ya know? I dunno, maybe I'm just....I dunno... I mean I feel so relaxed around hearing about your dates, and it's just.....it feels right for you to keep posting everything about her here. I suppose it may be because I just got out of a real bad message board relationship...I dunno. I hope you feel the same way too? Is it just me? or?

AMwood wrote:

you mean like smells and stuff?

  

goodbar wrote:Yes, as others have already said, keep this going for us. We know its early and everything but it just seems like there's something there, ya know? I dunno, maybe I'm just....I dunno... I mean I feel so relaxed around hearing about your dates, and it's just.....it feels right for you to keep posting everything about her here.  I suppose it may be because I just got out of a real bad message board relationship...I dunno. I hope you feel the same way too?  Is it just me? or?

no. it's not you. i feel it also. it's like i've known you for a very long time and stuff. i've already driven in front of your house a few times and it seems like it would be a nice place for me to live. it's even closer to my work. i hope you have a walk in closet in the master bedroom.

AMwood wrote:lolz. she's out of town this weekend for a funeral. but she has happened to text me the most inane shit that i am totally uninterested in. so get this. she likes spiders but not frogs. she doesn't like chocolate but she likes gummy bears. and she doesn't like thick crust pizza.

uhm, who gives a f*ck. just shut your pie hole and spread your legs. i don't really care what's going on in that unbalanced noodle of yours. i'm not indifferent about it. it actually pains me to hear it.

so in the mean time i get a reprieve this weekend. 2 faulking dates and i'm already enjoying our time apart.

So you guys got married?

Me thinks you should "live post" the next conversation. We can feed you lines like every bad sitcom plot...

Turtleneck wrote:

So you guys got married?

no. but i'm sure she's picking out dresses and has some ideas for the bridal party. even the ones on my side.

Notorious GiB wrote:

Not yet. There is more entertainment for the rest of us that this "relationship" can most certainly provide.

Exactly. Methinks AM Wood needs to stop being so Goddamn selfish all the time.

AMwood wrote:

no. it's not you. i feel it also. it's like i've known you for a very long time and stuff. i've already driven in front of your house a few times and it seems like it would be a nice place for me to live. it's even closer to my work. i hope you have a walk in closet in the master bedroom.

  

You virgin bro?

tBlairWhiteProject wrote:You virgin bro?

Clearly you don't know who you're talking to.

tBlairWhiteProject wrote:You virgin bro?

dude, catch up. i am a crazy bitch whisperer. you can learn more on the "2nd Date In" thread. bro, do you even lift?

AMwood wrote:

dude, catch up. i am a crazy bitch whisperer. you can learn more on the "2nd Date In" thread. bro, do you even lift?

It's like this guy has never heard the name Tina before. Fat cow that she is...  

AMwood wrote:

dude, catch up. i am a crazy bitch whisperer. you can learn more on the "2nd Date In" thread. bro, do you even lift?

Sorry I lost u at "2nd date". Real bros don't wait that long

tBlairWhiteProject wrote:

AMwood wrote:

dude, catch up. i am a crazy bitch whisperer. you can learn more on the "2nd Date In" thread. bro, do you even lift?

Sorry I lost u at "2nd date". Real bros don't wait that long

Hi buddy   

  

 

I got $20 on AMwood.

tTito wrote: 

I got $20 on AMwood.

To do what? Seal the deal? Who are you betting?

Chitown_Badger wrote:

To do what? Seal the deal? Who are you betting?

New guy is picking a fight with him and he's about to knocked-the- ****-out.

Leaving notifications on for this thread 

AMwood wrote:lolz. she's out of town this weekend for a funeral. but she has happened to text me the most inane shit that i am totally uninterested in. so get this. she likes spiders but not frogs. she doesn't like chocolate but she likes gummy bears. and she doesn't like thick crust pizza.

uhm, who gives a f*ck. just shut your pie hole and spread your legs. i don't really care what's going on in that unbalanced noodle of yours. i'm not indifferent about it. it actually pains me to hear it.

so in the mean time i get a reprieve this weekend. 2 faulking dates and i'm already enjoying our time apart.

Prediction: You're going to marry her.

Bizarro Fletch wrote:

Prediction: You're going to marry her.

and end up attending her church.

tTito wrote:

New guy is picking a fight with him and he's about to knocked-the- ****-out.

New guy, don't poke the Wood   

AMwood wrote:

and end up attending her church.

She's going to give you that sweet stuff and you will be all..."repent you fkin heathens" up in tSwills shit and stuff.