Will one of you guys read this for me?

I haven't been on any chinese porn sites, but every day they send this to me. I've put Chinese to English in, but it's all confusing. Maybe I'm reading it from left to right and I should be doing it from up to down? Help a brother out.

倠獴祬攽≴數琭慬楧渺⁣敮瑥爻∾㱁⁨牥昽≨瑴瀺⼯牯睡⹣潣潡浡湵晡捴畲敲⹣潭⽓㙤㍭ㄮ敵㼴㄰㈵㜳ㄽㄸ㘵㐱㜦㠷〷㌷㴲㠳☴㴱♩戶渷甽ㄢ‾㱆低吠獩穥㴢㘢⁣潬潲㴢⌰〷ㅁ㤢⁦慣攽≃慬楢物∾㱂㸼⽂㹄慮摪睡杳Ⱐ䑩獣潶敲⁴桥⁳散牥瑳映扥慵瑩晵氠慮搠祯畮来爠獫楮⸼⽁㸼⽐㸼䉒 㸊਼䍅乔䕒㸼䄠桲敦㴢桴瑰㨯⽲潷愮捯捯慭慮畦慣瑵牥爮捯洯匶搳洱⹥甿㐱〲㔷㌱㴱㠶㔴ㄷ☸㜰㜳㜽㈸㌦㐽ㄦ楢㙮㝵㴱∠㸼䥍䜠獲挽≨瑴瀺⼯牯睡⹣潣潡浡湵晡捴畲敲⹣潭⽢〵摦ㄷ㔰晤浱㝮㈸㌯戰㘰㑢⹰湧∾㰯䄾㰯䍅乔䕒㸼䉒 㸠ਊ㱃䕎呅刾㱁⁨牥昽≨瑴瀺⼯牯睡⹣潣潡浡湵晡捴畲敲⹣潭⽓㙤㍭ㄮ敵㼴㄰㈵㜳ㄽㄸ㘵㐱㜦㠷〷㌷㴲㠳☴㴲♩戶渷甽ㄢ‾㱉䵇⁳牣㴢桴瑰㨯⽲潷愮捯捯慭慮畦慣瑵牥爮捯洯戰㕤昱㜵て摭焷渲㠳⽥挷㍤㤮灮朢㸼⽁㸼⽃䕎呅刾㱂删⼾ ਼䍅乔䕒㸼䄠桲敦㴢桴瑰㨯⽲潷愮捯捯慭慮畦慣瑵牥爮捯洯匶搳洱⹥甿㐱〲㔷㌱㴱㠶㔴ㄷ☸㜰㜳㜽㈸㌦㐽㌦楢㙮㝵㴱∠㸼䥍䜠獲挽≨瑴瀺⼯牯睡⹣潣潡浡湵晡捴畲敲⹣潭⽢〵摦ㄷ㔰晤浱㝮㈸㌯㈰敥㌳⹐乇∾㰯䄾㰯䍅乔䕒㸼䉒 㸊

You are being extradited to China. U.S. immigration will be there today to deport you.

YOU GONE

LoneWolfSparty wrote:You are being extradited to China. U.S. immigration will be there today to deport you.

YOU GONE

lol -- you are the new me. epic fail.

Before I get into the whole thing, one question: does the quality touch you? If you answered no, then there's no point of me going on.

It roughly translates to you need to pay 500 dollar to fap to our porn skanks. I might be off on the amount though.

DWags wrote:I haven't been on any chinese porn sites, but every day they send this to me.   I've put Chinese to English in, but it's all confusing.  Maybe I'm reading it from left to right and I should be doing it from up to down?  Help a brother out.

倠獴祬攽≴數琭慬楧渺⁣敮瑥爻∾㱁⁨牥昽≨瑴瀺⼯牯睡⹣潣潡浡湵晡捴畲敲⹣潭⽓㙤㍭ㄮ敵㼴㄰㈵㜳ㄽㄸ㘵㐱㜦㠷〷㌷㴲㠳☴㴱♩戶渷甽ㄢ‾㱆低吠獩穥㴢㘢⁣潬潲㴢⌰〷ㅁ㤢⁦慣攽≃慬楢物∾㱂㸼⽂㹄慮摪睡杳Ⱐ䑩獣潶敲⁴桥⁳散牥瑳映扥慵瑩晵氠慮搠祯畮来爠獫楮⸼⽁㸼⽐㸼䉒 㸊਼䍅乔䕒㸼䄠桲敦㴢桴瑰㨯⽲潷愮捯捯慭慮畦慣瑵牥爮捯洯匶搳洱⹥甿㐱〲㔷㌱㴱㠶㔴ㄷ☸㜰㜳㜽㈸㌦㐽ㄦ楢㙮㝵㴱∠㸼䥍䜠獲挽≨瑴瀺⼯牯睡⹣潣潡浡湵晡捴畲敲⹣潭⽢〵摦ㄷ㔰晤浱㝮㈸㌯戰㘰㑢⹰湧∾㰯䄾㰯䍅乔䕒㸼䉒 㸠ਊ㱃䕎呅刾㱁⁨牥昽≨瑴瀺⼯牯睡⹣潣潡浡湵晡捴畲敲⹣潭⽓㙤㍭ㄮ敵㼴㄰㈵㜳ㄽㄸ㘵㐱㜦㠷〷㌷㴲㠳☴㴲♩戶渷甽ㄢ‾㱉䵇⁳牣㴢桴瑰㨯⽲潷愮捯捯慭慮畦慣瑵牥爮捯洯戰㕤昱㜵て摭焷渲㠳⽥挷㍤㤮灮朢㸼⽁㸼⽃䕎呅刾㱂删⼾ ਼䍅乔䕒㸼䄠桲敦㴢桴瑰㨯⽲潷愮捯捯慭慮畦慣瑵牥爮捯洯匶搳洱⹥甿㐱〲㔷㌱㴱㠶㔴ㄷ☸㜰㜳㜽㈸㌦㐽㌦楢㙮㝵㴱∠㸼䥍䜠獲挽≨瑴瀺⼯牯睡⹣潣潡浡湵晡捴畲敲⹣潭⽢〵摦ㄷ㔰晤浱㝮㈸㌯㈰敥㌳⹐乇∾㰯䄾㰯䍅乔䕒㸼䉒 㸊

Suimengzhiban ≴ number Luqinyangmiao ⁣ Xia Edward Ang Yao ∾ 㱁 ⁨ Fang Jue sound of water ⼯ revolves lucent ≨ sleep ⹣ Mindunboyou Busongsheqiao ⹣ Tan from forming 㙤 ㍭ ㄮ enemy 㼴 ㄰ a Specific 㜳 ㄽ ㄸ 㘵 㐱 㜦㠷 〷 ㌷ 㴲 㠳 ☴ 㴱 ♩ households Yan Quan ㄢ ~ 㱆 low bark Hui Yu 㴢 㘢 ⁣ Tan pigwash 㴢 ⌰ 〷 ㅁ 㤢 ⁦ accustomed to Ban ≃ Jin Ballad matter ∾ 㱂 JDXJH files 㹄 consider Jiang Yao Ⱐ 䑩 sleep Veterinary Hei knock ⁴ Bridge ⁳ scattered Fang Sosa  Yingdenyongying Dushen Lvshuozhenmu Laijuxianchu ⸼ ⽁ JDXJH contrast JDXJH 䉒 㸊 ਼ 䍅 Joe 䕒 JDXJH 䄠 Quince Dun 㴢 rafter Rose 㨯 ⽲ decanted Yaodaodaoyin Lvqiguanzhao Fangpao Daoqiejiuxia er ⹥ rogue 㐱 〲 㔷 ㌱ 㴱 㠶 㔴 ㄷ ☸ 㜰 㜳 㜽 the LES ㌦ 㐽 ㄦ Ballad 㙮 㝵 㴱 ∠ JDXJH 䥍 䜠 been rolled ≨ Jue sound of water ⼯ revolves sleep ⹣ Mindunboyou Busongsheqiao ⹣

             
           

them's the North Korean nuclear launch codes, breh.

DWags wrote:I haven't been on any chinese porn sites, but every day they send this to me. I've put Chinese to English in, but it's all confusing. Maybe I'm reading it from left to right and I should be doing it from up to down? Help a brother out.

倠獴祬攽≴數琭慬楧渺⁣敮瑥爻∾㱁⁨牥昽≨瑴瀺⼯牯睡⹣潣潡浡湵晡捴畲敲⹣潭⽓㙤㍭ㄮ敵㼴㄰㈵㜳ㄽㄸ㘵㐱㜦㠷〷㌷㴲㠳☴㴱♩戶渷甽ㄢ‾㱆低吠獩穥㴢㘢⁣潬潲㴢⌰〷ㅁ㤢⁦慣攽≃慬楢物∾㱂㸼⽂㹄慮摪睡杳Ⱐ䑩獣潶敲⁴桥⁳散牥瑳映扥慵瑩晵氠慮搠祯畮来爠獫楮⸼⽁㸼⽐㸼䉒 㸊਼䍅乔䕒㸼䄠桲敦㴢桴瑰㨯⽲潷愮捯捯慭慮畦慣瑵牥爮捯洯匶搳洱⹥甿㐱〲㔷㌱㴱㠶㔴ㄷ☸㜰㜳㜽㈸㌦㐽ㄦ楢㙮㝵㴱∠㸼䥍䜠獲挽≨瑴瀺⼯牯睡⹣潣潡浡湵晡捴畲敲⹣潭⽢〵摦ㄷ㔰晤浱㝮㈸㌯戰㘰㑢⹰湧∾㰯䄾㰯䍅乔䕒㸼䉒 㸠ਊ㱃䕎呅刾㱁⁨牥昽≨瑴瀺⼯牯睡⹣潣潡浡湵晡捴畲敲⹣潭⽓㙤㍭ㄮ敵㼴㄰㈵㜳ㄽㄸ㘵㐱㜦㠷〷㌷㴲㠳☴㴲♩戶渷甽ㄢ‾㱉䵇⁳牣㴢桴瑰㨯⽲潷愮捯捯慭慮畦慣瑵牥爮捯洯戰㕤昱㜵て摭焷渲㠳⽥挷㍤㤮灮朢㸼⽁㸼⽃䕎呅刾㱂删⼾ ਼䍅乔䕒㸼䄠桲敦㴢桴瑰㨯⽲潷愮捯捯慭慮畦慣瑵牥爮捯洯匶搳洱⹥甿㐱〲㔷㌱㴱㠶㔴ㄷ☸㜰㜳㜽㈸㌦㐽㌦楢㙮㝵㴱∠㸼䥍䜠獲挽≨瑴瀺⼯牯睡⹣潣潡浡湵晡捴畲敲⹣潭⽢〵摦ㄷ㔰晤浱㝮㈸㌯㈰敥㌳⹐乇∾㰯䄾㰯䍅乔䕒㸼䉒 㸊

Dinner at 8. Please bring a duck.

Not sure what that means, but good luck.

Something something they're here to take your kidney and skin.

Congratulations on your new baby boy!

Larry Kazamias wrote:

Suimengzhiban ≴ number Luqinyangmiao ⁣ Xia Edward Ang Yao ∾ 㱁 ⁨ Fang Jue sound of water ⼯ revolves lucent ≨ sleep ⹣ Mindunboyou Busongsheqiao ⹣ Tan from forming 㙤 ㍭ ㄮ enemy 㼴 ㄰ a Specific 㜳 ㄽ ㄸ 㘵 㐱 㜦㠷 〷 ㌷ 㴲 㠳 ☴ 㴱 ♩ households Yan Quan ㄢ ~ 㱆 low bark Hui Yu 㴢 㘢 ⁣ Tan pigwash 㴢 ⌰ 〷 ㅁ 㤢 ⁦ accustomed to Ban ≃ Jin Ballad matter ∾ 㱂 JDXJH files 㹄 consider Jiang Yao Ⱐ 䑩 sleep Veterinary Hei knock ⁴ Bridge ⁳ scattered Fang Sosa  Yingdenyongying Dushen Lvshuozhenmu Laijuxianchu ⸼ ⽁ JDXJH contrast JDXJH 䉒 㸊 ਼ 䍅 Joe 䕒 JDXJH 䄠 Quince Dun 㴢 rafter Rose 㨯 ⽲ decanted Yaodaodaoyin Lvqiguanzhao Fangpao Daoqiejiuxia er ⹥ rogue 㐱 〲 㔷 ㌱ 㴱 㠶 㔴 ㄷ ☸ 㜰 㜳 㜽 the LES ㌦ 㐽 ㄦ Ballad 㙮 㝵 㴱 ∠ JDXJH 䥍 䜠 been rolled ≨ Jue sound of water ⼯ revolves sleep ⹣ Mindunboyou Busongsheqiao ⹣

In this I read "jue" and "Accustomed to Ban".

Is Tanfan trying to say something to me in code?

Notorious GiB wrote:It roughly translates to you need to pay 500 dollar to fap to our porn skanks. I might be off on the amount though.

Do the Chinese even have porn?

Cartwright, table for four.

loosely translates to: "please do not speculate."

I think it's tRCMB's new mission statement... celebrating communism and squashing dissent. Ya know.. those things that China holds very close to it's heart.

Robert J Sakimano wrote:I think it's tRCMB's new mission statement... celebrating communism and squashing dissent. Ya know.. those things that China holds very close to it's heart.

you sound britter.

goodbar wrote:

you sound britter.

  

Get albertkenny over here stat

DWags wrote:

In this I read "jue" and "Accustomed to Ban".

Is Tanfan trying to say something to me in code?

I guess they have a lot if "sound of water" in Chinese porn.